I caught myself thinking about a gift I'd like to give Leilani for Christmas today, wtf? Christmas? Its July!!! I realized I have no idea how I have managed to go through half of a year and feel like I blinked. This has been the fastest 6 months of my life, no joke. Time sped up the minute Orion was born and I feel like I want to step on the breaks. I looked at some of my favorite photos on our fridge and realized they are almost a year old. We just took those vacations, right? How did the sweet newborn that I gave birth to turn into a crawling/standing/pseudo walking babe overnight? I missed the special moments that I got to have with Leilani. The cuddling for hours, the quiet book reading sessions, one on one play with baskets of colors and textures, all of those have never been an option with two in the house. I feel like they'll be moving out before I know it, and I won't know what happened to my life. I'd like to slow down.... right now. Maybe I need to stay home more often during the week, make family time a priority over errands or even *gasp* play dates (obviously not every day, can't live without the o'mamas). They will only be this small once, and I want to witness every moment (well almost). I'll have to think of more ways of slowing down... I think it will be better for the kids too. They will have a mother who is more present, more mindfully aware of the present.